This is a difficult post to make, however, one that needs to be made. Can any of us look at someone and tell if they are biased or would not discriminate against another individual or group of people? Probably not! Having taught Fair Housing for over fifteen years and coached hundreds of my own team members in my career, none of us can say we know who might discriminate! After watching what is happening in the news and hearing some of the comments, something touched me last night in a news story and really made me think about how I was brought up and even some things about my family I am today ashamed of. This from someone who has never looked at the color of a persons skin, their sex, or national origin (just to name a few) as how I judged them or thought about them. I hope each of you that read this do so in learning as well as reflecting and about the question I originally asked. This is not easy, and I understand this can be a touchy subject for some people, even though I believe it we talked about it more there might be less issues such as what we are seeing. Anyway, here goes.
I grew up in a mid-western town in Central Illinois surrounded by farm communities. I went to school not being around people of other colors or nationalities, and in fact the first person of color I met in was in my Sophomore year of high school when they bused several African-Americans to attend as part of a desegregation program. You might guest I am not young, and you would be right. Even though this was the late 60's and early 70's, our country was still going through challenges understanding the concept, "All men are created equal." I definitely owe my upbringing to my father and mother. My father was someone who was admired by all no matter who they were, and had many friends that were of other nationalities and ethnic groups. I never heard him use disparaging words against anyone, unless you cut him off in traffic and then he didn't care who you were just what you did. I was brought up to believe we are all equal and have the same opportunities in this country if we choose to find them.
So where is this going and how does it relate to knowing if someone chooses not to follow the value of equality? Let me start by saying growing up I always though my Grandfather on my Mothers side was the most loving and caring person in the world. In no way would I have ever imagined him as anyone other than someone who had a kind sole. He was active in his church and a respected elder, appeared to be an upstanding member of his community, and served in World War I for our country. I watched him one time take a baby bird that had fallen from a nest and carefully climb a tree to return it to so it could be cared for by its parents. He took food to those in need, and it was not uncommon to hear he had helped a neighbor or others in the community financially. In my eyes, he was a wonderful person. It was not until after his death a dark side was revealed. Now my grandparents lived in a very small community with the entire county population at around 24,000, and the small town around 10,000. After his death my Mother was helping my Grandmother clean out some of his personal belongings. She opened a bottom drawer and found a large sheet with a hood attached to it. My Mother asked my Grandmother what this was and she made a comment, "You weren't supposed to see that." I'm sure you can guess what it was! My Mother did not have any idea he was this kind of person. This was Central Illinois, not the deep south. This was a small community in the Land of Lincoln, not somewhere south of the Mason/Dixon line. This was someone you never would have imagined could be associated with an organization I grew up understanding was not about freedom, liberty, and fairness.
What does discrimination look like? There is no description and it can be anyone. Our industry has set many trends and standards in anti-discrimination leadership through teaching and leading others to believe we all have the same rights. What we are seeing in Chicago, Baltimore, Missouri, and other areas is unfortunate and appears to be led by a few and not by the many who see this country for what it is and can be. I pray we can find peace and a way for all of us to live together. We all need to come together, let our justice system take its course, and find some way to understand one another not divide us. We do not know who may may or may not believe in fairness, but I do believe the vast majority of Americans do not follow discriminatory behavior. No society is perfect but having visited 28 different countries in my lifetime I can saw we have an awesome country with the opportunity for any of us to choose the right course and to reach their goals. Many of us have skeletons in our family closet, some will never be known. I am proud of the industry I have worked in for over twenty years, and for what it stands for. So the next time you think of fair housing simply remember, it does not have a face or a color or a name. It simply means everyone matters.
